On the nurtured culture of self-loathing

Use this or use a soft camera filter over the eyes of everyone who sees you (because that's what they had to use on Olivia Wilde, too). Age used to about mature grace. Now it's a bad word.

Seriously, the way consumerism is driving self-loathing, it's not hard to see why we are so disconnected from each other, why there is so much strife, why so many of us are fake (fake enough to make Barbie jealous), and why (ironic in reference to where I am airing this) the internet is our escape.

Up to you to mute the ads, ignore the hype, trust your grandma's advice on beauty (or how to be great despite aging naturally).

If you can't believe there's much, much more to you than your skin, you shall reap a harvest of hate - and it will surely and sorely spread beyond you.

I know it sounds alarmist and overstated. But so is the ad in a deeply insidious way.

Places you at the bottom of the beauty hierarchy so that you need products to use as rungs to climb an imaginary ladder that actually goes nowhere.

Perhaps, you need a better beholder for your beauty. But first, let it be you.

Scarred for life - the tale of a courageous girl

What strikes you the very first time you talk to Sonali Mukherjee is clarity of purpose and a grit and determination that is unparalleled in one so young. What is also apparent is that disfigurement that her body has suffered has only strengthened her sense that justice is every one's right. What may shock you however is her bitterness at the current legal system, which has not only let her attackers out on bail but also cannot with any existing punishment commensurate with her suffering.

"Even if they (attackers) are given life imprisonment they will be eating, sleeping and living in relative comfort. Can that compare with my plight? I am not saying there should be tit-for-tat - I know that will not happen. Only if they are left to live in a dark room, cut off from all others and made to suffer can they understand what I have been and am going through," says Sonali, with a passion that conveys the pain of a nine-year, largely lonely fight. 

Be shocked at her views only after you have a sense of what happened to her on the night of April 22, 2003. Seeking relief from the oppressive heat, Sonali, her sister and her father were sleeping in the open on the terrace of their Dhanbad home. The three attackers - Tapas Mitra, Sanjay Paswan and Brahmadev Hajra - stole in and poured acid on her, scarring her sister and father too in the scuffle that ensued. 

"At that moment, my world just stopped. All I could feel was the burning and my body melting away. I felt the most excruciating pain and the world went dark," recalls Sonali vividly. Her face, neck, upper and lower torso suffered burns. She hasn't been able to see ever since though her hearing has been restored through multiple surgeries. She suffered 70% burns and her sister 20% burns.

What prompted this devious attack - her objection to three men's weeks-long abuse and their inability to take rejection. Patriarchy reared its head in its ugliest form and three men set out to teach a strong-willed young woman 'a lesson'. 

The three were arrested and sentenced to nine years imprisonment, but within three years they were all out on bail, one because he was a juvenile when he committed the crime. 

Sonali's fight has been on three levels - her treatment and a drive to be like 'any other woman' (which is also why she refuses to be photographed currently). Second is the legal fight to bring the perpetrators to book. Once she feels her medical condition is under control (she currently has to avoid contact to stay clear of infection and regeneration of tissue is being helped by two 'tissue extenders', one each in her head and neck). The third is helping her family, which has been driven to bankruptcy due to legal and medical expenses. 

Needless to say, this will take a lot of grit. Talk to Sonali for a bit and you will be left in no doubt that there's more than enough of that. Added to that is a sharp, alert mind that is not only on top of her medical treatment's progress, but is also looking for new avenues to ease the burden of her family.

"For three years after the attack I could not walk or even get out of bed. The doctors in Bokaro had said that mine was a hopeless case and they could not do anything for me. At that time, my father (Chandidas Mukherjee) carried on the fight. Through all the legal hearings, managing finances by selling all we had, and taking care of me, my father stood tall and strong. That was a dark time for me, confined to a room and I must have lost hope many times. But as soon as I was able to move around, I joined the fight and have been at it despite the pain, discomfort and lack of support from all others I thought I could have counted on," says Sonali.

Her father's support is what she has come to count as most precious. "Once I could move around and took stock, my father supported me without question. Wherever I said we would go - whether it worked for us or not, and mostly it did not - he would accompany me without opposition. Through heat, rain, the cold, through government apathy, threat to our lives and severe financial crises, he has stood by me when I was alone," she says with a palpable flourish in her voice. 

In the following six years, Sonali approached three chief ministers, countless legislators, and NGOs, including the National Commission for Women and Salman Khan's Being Human organisation, was either ignored, received nothing more than assurances or just used for media bytes. There were sporadic reports in the regional media in and around Jharkhand about Sonali's fight and slowly mediapersons came to know her and empathise with her cause.

This came handy when on July 9, 2012 she approached Krishna Tirath, minister for women and child welfare and was met with traditional government apathy.

"I went to the minister's official residence and waited for hours. Various members of her staff gave me conflicting reports - she's abroad, she's in a meeting, you need an appointment, she is across town - but continued to wait. Then I called a media contact I knew in Jharkhand (connected with Sahara Samay) who called his Noida office and a few journalists showed up. It was then the staff realised that I was not to be ignored. They called the minister and after she showed up, she gave an assurance that she would appeal to the PM to release money from his relief fund. That's the last I've heard from the minister," Sonali says.

It was then that Sonali laid down two options for the government - either help her financially, or give her permission to die. "This was taken up the media and a lot of people learnt of my struggle. It was a call to bring attention to the apathy that my family and I have been facing. It wasn't that I had given up the fight or lost hope - but I did want to the state to realise its responsibility."

Help, though sporadic, has been coming through from unexpected quarters. 

"Ram Jethmalani heard about my struggle and called me over to his office in July or August 2011. Apart from expressing solidarity with my cause and showing genuine compassion, he also helped us financially with Rs 1.45 lakh, which has helped with my treatment.

"After I laid down the options for the government, there has been more attention and help from various quarters," says Sonali.

The BL Kapoor Hospital in New Delhi, where Sonali's treatment is in progress, has offered to help her. Sanjeevani, a Bokaro-based organisation has come forth as has Foundation Beti, the latter helping her with Rs 30 lakh. The poignant and sensitively shot episode Kaun Banega Crorepati in which Sonali was accompanied by Lara Dutta Bhupati is now national knowledge. However, the Rs 25 lakh that she won will be taxed at the rate of 30%, against which TMC MP Derek O'Brien has issued an appeal. However, more popular support would be required to see the waiver through on the grounds of this being the rarest of rare cases. 

A public appeal for funds was also issued through Hallabol.com, which helped some but more funds are welcome because it's becoming necessary for Sonali to consult doctors abroad for specialised surgeries and treatment.

Her legal and moral fight is also far from over.

"Why shouldn't my attackers be charged with attempt to murder and grevious assault? Why isn't there harsher punishment for perpetrators of acid attacks when the victim's life is not only endangered but altered for the worse? Why doesn't the government take responsibility for such attacks? If you can pay crores toward Ajmal Kasab's security but can't protect women, you should at least pay to support their treatment in full and for their rehabilitation. After all, it happened on your watch," questions Sonali.

If you want to trip out without drugs

Don't know if I love the girl more or her eyes, the filter or the effect achieved more, the story or how much I can relate to this more. All I know is I am hooked and there's no coming back from the high standards set by this video and song. Trippy as hell.

Can't believe it's believe this has been out for more than a year and I hadn't caught. So, here's thanking MTV Indies again for aiding discovery.

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised (Click to listen)
You will not be able to stay home, brother.
You will not be able to plug in, turn on and cop out.
You will not be able to lose yourself on skag and skip,
Skip out for beer during commercials,
Because the revolution will not be televised.

The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by Xerox
In 4 parts without commercial interruptions.
The revolution will not show you pictures of Nixon
blowing a bugle and leading a charge by John
Mitchell, General Abrams and Spiro Agnew to eat
hog maws confiscated from a Harlem sanctuary.
The revolution will not be televised.

The revolution will not be brought to you by the
Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie
Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia.
The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal.
The revolution will not get rid of the nubs.
The revolution will not make you look five pounds
thinner, because the revolution will not be televised, Brother.

There will be no pictures of you and Willie May
pushing that shopping cart down the block on the dead run,
or trying to slide that color television into a stolen ambulance.
NBC will not be able predict the winner at 8:32
or report from 29 districts.
The revolution will not be televised.

There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
brothers in the instant replay.
There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
brothers in the instant replay.
There will be no pictures of Whitney Young being
run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process.
There will be no slow motion or still life of Roy
Wilkens strolling through Watts in a Red, Black and
Green liberation jumpsuit that he had been saving
For just the proper occasion.

Green Acres, The Beverly Hillbillies, and Hooterville
Junction will no longer be so damned relevant, and
women will not care if Dick finally gets down with
Jane on Search for Tomorrow because Black people
will be in the street looking for a brighter day.
The revolution will not be televised.

There will be no highlights on the eleven o'clock
news and no pictures of hairy armed women
liberationists and Jackie Onassis blowing her nose.
The theme song will not be written by Jim Webb,
Francis Scott Key, nor sung by Glen Campbell, Tom
Jones, Johnny Cash, Englebert Humperdink, or the Rare Earth.
The revolution will not be televised.

The revolution will not be right back after a message
about a white tornado, white lightning, or white people.
You will not have to worry about a dove in your
bedroom, a tiger in your tank, or the giant in your toilet bowl.
The revolution will not go better with Coke.
The revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath.
The revolution will put you in the driver's seat.

The revolution will not be televised, will not be televised,
will not be televised, will not be televised.
The revolution will be no re-run brothers;
The revolution will be live.

PENGUIN BOOKS INDIA – STATEMENT ON THE HINDUS BY WENDY DONIGER

Penguin Books India believes, and has always believed, in every individual’s right to freedom of thought and expression, a right explicitly codified in the Indian Constitution. This commitment informs Penguin’s approach to publishing in every territory of the world, and we have never been shy about testing that commitment in court when appropriate. At the same time, a publishing company has the same obligation as any other organisation to respect the laws of the land in which it operates, however intolerant and restrictive those laws may be. We also have a moral responsibility to protect our employees against threats and harassment where we can.
The settlement reached this week brings to a close a four year legal process in which Penguin has defended the publication of the Indian edition of The Hindus by Wendy Doniger. We have published, in succession, hardcover, paperback and e-book editions of the title. International editions of the book remain available physically and digitally to Indian readers who still wish to purchase it.
We stand by our original decision to publish The Hindus, just as we stand by the decision to publish other books that we know may cause offence to some segments of our readership. We believe, however, that the Indian Penal Code, and in particular section 295A of that code, will make it increasingly difficult for any Indian publisher to uphold international standards of free expression without deliberately placing itself outside the law.
This is, we believe, an issue of great significance not just for the protection of creative freedoms in India but also for the defence of fundamental human rights.

I don’t want to be this person anymore

Powerful words of Maya Krishna Rao, at Reclaim the Republic, 26/01/14

I don’t want to be this person anymore
No, no, no, more
Who sits and waits
Waits waits 
To see what happens 4 months down the line
I walked all of last year, 
We covered the earth last year
With our footfalls…. last year
The sound resounds in my ears, from last year
We walked…
Where we walked we walked we walked
We didn’t sit, we walked
We lay 
We changed the law, we changed the talk, we walked
We changed the sit, we changed their stand
changed hearts… minds
we walked
So now how do we sit, how do we say nothing
Do nothing, 
I don’t want to be this woman
I want to be this woman in 2014
The one I was in 2013
I saw a girl put to death in a bus…out of a bus… in 2012
We changed the law in 2013
So let's get rid of a man in 2014
4 months down the line
we can't sit, we can't walk we must run
all of these 4 months 
There’s a stalker amongst us
there’s a stalker who walks

who a stalker who stalks 
he walks, we must run
lets get rid of him
not let him walk in 2014, 
not let him talk 2014
not let him lie in 2014,
what lies, what lies, lies 
not let him lie, not let him walk 2014
4 months down the line

so why don’t we just sit and think about what we can do
what we should do
they call it a ‘wave’ 
every 30 secs on television 
which ever channel you break
and you break 
and you break and you break ….breaking news

post why don’t we just post
by the minute, by the second 
on every social network site
what bite? Where’s the fight….? 
Lets just bite…get on the net, fight
Evry second That much we can do
Why don’t we post?

So how can I let a man who looms so large
Let his shadow creep over this same land…. so large

So we got rid rid of stalkers
And we’ll let a stalker walK all over us
Let a stalker walk walker all over us????

Whether its education
Farmers, women, per capita consumption
Women’s literacy, 
water, electricity
Just post, talk, 
walk, talk….
numbers walk
post nos.
Numbers talk
Minimum wage: Gujarat - Rs 276 for men and Rs 213 for women.
National average- Rs 332 for men and Rs 253 for women
Lets post every second, every minute
Lets post our bite
Have we ever known such brutality
Singling out the cruelest ways to attack women
Have we ever seen it in any fight…
Any so called riot?
Have we ever seen numbers talk?
Numbers talk
Post a number -
69.7% of children up to the age of five - anaemic 
44.6% malnourished 
In 1951, Gujarat had 954 women per 1,000 men 
In 2011 it was 918 women to 1000 men
Why, in 2002…. he killed them in the womb himself.
Why… have we ever seen in any riot so many women 
Singled out for such brutality, ever ?? 

In 2011 with only 760 girls per 1000 boys 
In 2009 58% never made it to class 10
15 lakh youths in the state are still unemployed today 
He promised one crore job opportunities but generated just 5.62 lakh

Let's post little stories….here’s one
Manjula Vaghela, a domestic help in Pardhol village just outside Ahmedabad has been applying for an electricity connection since 2002.But 10 years on, she still has no connection at home. Her family is registered as BPL, but she has not got any facilities from the government. “I was forced to shift my two sons to a community-run hostel so that they get a better future”, she says. We can barely manage two square meals.



*Another performance from this woman of inspiring words

No jokes please. We're Indian (and we're dark)

 Doesn't take much for us normally racist Indians (so comfortable about - all Gujjus are penny-pinchers, these Panjjus/Biharis have no culture, these Bongs speak with a rasgulla in their mouth, oh god these Ghaatis, do business with a snake but not with a Sindhi, oh lord these Madrasis [everyone from beyond Maharashtra] are always dripping with coconut oil, these North Easterns are all shameless/drug addicts - sorry if I left someone out) to turn self-righteous.

This time it took a 5 year old video of a stand-up comedian/poet -turned politician dug up conveniently by political parties (who have been ideologically vacant for many decades, which we never noticed) to get us all riled up - again.

It isn't funny that we are the same group of people who have forgotten the pogrom of 1984 sparked by two Sikhs killing a PM which targeted many of the same people who had wanted to escape the separatist insurgency in their state.

That case is still pending but we'd rather be devastated by a joke.

The same party who has been shielding the instigators of murder, rape, arson, and barbarism has enjoyed the privileges of power and in the past 10 years declared open the Great Indian Clearance Sale (strictly on commission basis). All thanks to us. But please, no racist jokes.

We are the same group of people who stared nonchalantly as the another party sought to revitalise the 'divide and rule' policies of the British through archaic symbols like chariots and bows, reminding people that minorities should be scared regularly else our 'culture' will suffer. Let's put them in their place, they said, by demolishing a mosque and refreshing old wounds.

Footage of that incident is invaluable material for any corporate trainer in the vast industry that is international terrorism to use to brainwash Muslim youth.

That case is pending too and the man who played on the weaknesses of one religious community against another is still speaking from the high stages of morality and ‘Indian culture’ hiding his failed ambition of leading this nation. (Insert a convenient “a Sindhi is worse than a snake” reference here.)

But we’d rather be devastated by a joke about dark-skinned nurses conveniently being dug up out of context by highly biased news channels who in turn are supported by advertisements of fairness creams. If they had any sense of sarcasm they would cue the joke and ads back-to-back. Alas!

We are still the same group of people who scoff at the ‘antics’ and ‘theatrics’ of a chief minister who takes the unorthodox approach of protesting on the streets to get what the above-mentioned parties have only paid lip service to – control over the only police force in the country not under state government purview.

In fact, the concept of being on the street after being elected, leave alone protesting after becoming CM, is an alien to the Indian psyche. “You got power. Now why are you creating a ruckus? And please don’t make me late for office. My petty office politics needs me more.”

We’re the same group of straight-faced people who stayed cosy and warm in our heated home, enjoying the amazing softness of imported quilts while criticising a bespectacled man who chose to sleep out in the open so he could begin reigning in famously corrupt police force. The same police force whose bribes have to be factored in in the accounts of all businesses – legal, quasi-legal and illegal – in the city.

But please, bring about change about some other way. Don’t disrupt my day and don’t indulge in theatrics. And what’s this thing about not needing those famous signs of power – the red beacon on a white car (make it a SUV while you’re at it) and a long trail of bustling, bristling security? Why the heck did you run for office? Never mind that you say you didn’t. That’s what they all say.

You know, the joke’s really on us and not on dark-skinned nurses. We are all the straw men (and women) that Winston Churchill talked about – easily blown about and scattered, our purpose petty if not unclear and very snug in our post-liberalisation comforts. Prick our sentiments about religion, colour, community (long list of buttons to push) and you’ve got us. Common sense and memory is something we are a bit less susceptible to.

We’re pretty ridiculous. But please – don’t joke about it.